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About Deviant SeekaMale/United States Recent Activity
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Warning: Some freaky shit lies within. Please go prepared.
Hey guys! What's up?

I really wish I could be on more. But I can't. I'm hoping something good happens soon.

I plan on taking up some magick and maybe forcing things to get better. Though that is not the proper use of magick. But I do need some help that may require harnessing (or in a horrible misread of the definition of magic in my mythology book, HARASSING) powers normally out of my control.

Though I don't really plan on castng any magick on me, and the magick would only benefit me in secondary or tertiary way. That is, if in casting the magicks knowing that doesn't take that immediately away.

Before anyone asks, I plan on only casting magicks that do not require blood or demons or spirits of the dead or other negative entities. I'm in too much of a rut of bad luck to mess with demons or blood loss. While I know blood magick isn't all bad, but blood is just so sacred a part of you, I believe nothing good can come out of it. While I also know that not all demons are bad, I'm just not in too pleasurable of a mood to be dealing with them. that and I tend to be forgetful, so, I may end up with that sloth demon (I think it's sloth portrayed eternally on a toilet) in my bathroom. That isn't something good to wake up too.

So only entity free magics for me! Or at least free of entities who may have a more negative effect on my life. Though my magick may or may not be fey free. And those creatures can be pretty malevolent. And I really don't want to piss any of them off. Especially since we have like this... mini-forest next my trailer and IT'S FILLED WITH A LOT OF FUCKING SPIDERS!!

My spells I'm hoping to get cast would be something for my brother's luck with jobs and get him out of here before winter. I really don't want him here anymore, just for his own health. And also, the quicker he gets out of here, the quicker I can get through the next few weeks of my mother and father doing nothing but bitch about him. Another spell would be for good luck in money for my father and mother. That would help us with their awful financial situation.

How do either of those effect me? To the point I would be scared to cast a spell because my selfishness may seep in?

My brother has promised to get me out of this house if he gets a job and settles down. My parents having more money may end with me with internet and some more definable control of my life.

So yes, having to deal with that may end up breaking my mind a little bit.

I am thinking about starting a Redbubble, but since I'm not all that confident in my photography, I'm doubting myself.

I just really want to do something about my internet problem, you know? I feel so disconnected from the world. Disconnected from the world nd everyone and everything. Just feeling really alone. Like I'll die alone and forgotten.

I know that sounds ridiculous, especially with some of the lives I have touched in at least some way, but being alone, being forgotten, dying alone, those are my worst fears. they are the causes of my anxieties.

And being so disconnected when I used to be so in touch... it causes me a lot of things. I feel so dumb because I don't know things. I don't know what's happening. I don't know anything anymore.

It's just effecting me, ya know?

Anyways, hope to see you again soon!


United States

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Journal History


Add a Comment:
techgnotic Featured By Owner Apr 2, 2015
Happy Birthday!!

happy DA B-day :3 
HugQueen Featured By Owner Sep 5, 2014   Writer
Thank you for the favorite. <3 Your webcam made me giggle. c:
pa3kpanda Featured By Owner Sep 4, 2014  Student Digital Artist
Thanks for the fave!!
ij386 Featured By Owner Aug 29, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Your webcam is hilarious!
UltimaMage578 Featured By Owner Aug 29, 2014
pa3kpanda Featured By Owner Aug 23, 2014  Student Digital Artist
thanks for the fave!
Yami08 Featured By Owner Jul 7, 2014  Professional Digital Artist
thanks for the fav!! :D
Mishberries Featured By Owner Jun 13, 2014
Hey Seeka, Thank you so much for the fave :heart: Really appreciate it!
UltimaMage578 Featured By Owner Jun 13, 2014
Queen-Kitty Featured By Owner May 20, 2014   Photographer
Thank you for the favorites!  I'm glad you enjoyed them!
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